Change the way you think, change the way you live, change the way you love, change the way you hate.

Forgiveness is always the important element in life, but it's so hard, so hard. Especially when you been hurt for such a long time, the feeling you hide, the hatred you have. 

click here  : If you can understand Cantonese great, if not, just read the subtitle.

Yea. No one in this world who has that responsible for you happiness, sadness, you are the one who take control for all your emotions. No one in this world who has to treat you good as his nature, NO ONE. 

Happy birthday Qiuli Teoh!

Movie night - Breaking Dawn Part 2!

Hello! How are you guys? :) I am trying to update my blog as frequent as I can. Maybe two times per week! How rajin I am! :P

Finally! It took forever! Breaking dawn part 2 is here! Oh gosh! I just can't wait for that! I'd been waiting for so long! HAHAHA. I'm Edward's fan, not Jacob's, but I found out many people in US prefer Jacobs. However, I WAS ATTRACTED BY THE TWILIGHT STORYLINE THE MOST, not the actors and actress!

I found some parts of it was kinda boring and LAME, but it's still romantic thou! Girls love romance movie right?! I have to agree what Margaret told, it was not a guys' movie! hahah! Most of the twilight fans would be girls. Boys who watched it probably forced by their girlfriend. :P I love Renesmee the most in this movie. Uhmm. How about yours?

I went to My Thai Cafe for dinner with Tracy and Chin Lin before the movie started.

My Thai Cafe is a Thai restaurant which located at the downtown! Their food taste really really nice! I went there two weeks once. They serve nice main dishes and desserts!

My favorite dish - Green curry! (Sliced potato, eggplants. beef "you can choose shrimp if you want")

Rate: 10/10 <Spicy level : Thai Hot is recommended>

Fried ice cream! People who never tried this before would like it, but not me. Malaysia's is better! :)

Rate: 7/10 

Fresh Mango with sweet sticky rice (Mango, sticky rice, sweet coconut milk)! Love this! It reminds me Hatyai and Alor Star! I miss home! I feel home!

Rate: 10/10 

My Thai Cafe

3316 W Third Street

Bloomington IN 47404-4846

After that, I went to College Mall to do some shopping and plan what to buy on Black Friday with Tracy. Basically, black friday is a crazy sales on the Friday midnight of Thanksgiving week. Many people queue up in front of the mall very early just for the CRAZY SALES, many good deal stuffs offered that day! LOL

#OOTD Winter Jacket (Hollister), Black dot short (Forever21), Purple denim shorts (Topshop), Random legging, Vitello Lux, also called Bow bag (MiuMiu)

Boots (Pay less) I think I bought it for 40 dollars. :)

What girls always do! Selca in the toilet. Tsk! 

With effect! (Line apps)

Tracy was holding a UGG shoe for baby, it's cute but pricey! :O

My face was red. Blame my sensitive skin.

After movie! (Margaret, Tracy and Me) Margaret is an American from Texas! She's so nice and lovely! :) hahaha how funny was she! She spoke Korean when she first met me. I said I didn't get what she trying to tell me, I don't understand Korean! She replied "awh! I thought you know, Malaysians speak many different kind of languages, so I am not sure whether you know Korean or not."

Hell not. We only speak Mandarin, Malay, Cantonese, Hokkien and English (most of us, there're people who can speak Hakka and Fuchou, different dialects of Mandarin.) I wanted to learn Korean tough, I think this language uhmmm sounds sexy. LOL. Unluckily, my Uni doesn't offer at Spring semester, will take it during Fall! Hopefully! :D

Lastly, under the cold weather. It's really cold. -6 degree Celcius.

Have a nice day! <3 you guys!

Halloween

Happy belated Halloween guys! I know it's quite late. So sorry. I was so busy for my tests before. Of course, busy for parties too! LOL.

As you guys know, Halloween falls at October 31. This year, it's on Wednesday. So, we celebrated the weekends before and after October 31. This is the first year I celebrated Halloween. I didn't really celebrate Halloween back in Malaysia.

What's the most important thing before Halloween? COSTUME! I went to a shop - "Spirit of Halloween" with Dafnie!

Hi Dafnie! You look cool with the mask on! haha

This look so er er CUTE :D

So many choices! :D 

I even saw a couple costume! Bacon and Egg! LMFAO. I love the Egypt and Indian princess costume. They look so pretty, but they're so pricey. I really got myself something here. But I didn't use it for any party. Such a waste. I bought a black and white make up palette, but I don't know how to put it on, and I also bought a pair of zombie teeth, still don't know how to use it. LOL

The 1st event I joined was organized by the Malaysian Students Association. I appreciate the hard work they paid. So sorry I didn't help for anything. I didn't take any photo on that day, I grabbed these two photos from Facebook. hahaha! It's fun! There's free pizza as well! :) Malaysian rock! So sad I can't enjoy the event until the last minute. I went for one hour, and then went back my dorm for study. I had a test on the next day! So sad right! :(

The poster! :) Theme: A nightmare on 10th Street! :)

Pumpkin! O.O These emotion look evil. 

After a two hours study... .... I went to Yi Yang's house with Ee Leng, Luo Rong, and Chin Hua, Chit-Chatting session. We had some drinks (coke? No, it's beers and whisky! :p) , warm up before the next party. I had a bottle of beer and a shot. How I miss! The first time I drunk alcohol since I came to US! I miss my Black Label whiskey mixed with Pokka Green Tea now. :(

Next partyyy, opps. I think it was considered as clubbing. hahaha. It's at Great Wall Restaurant. We were dancing and drinking for the whole night! Thanks JY for treating us alcohol. Me and Ee Leng can't buy, we are not legal to buy drink. The legal age for drinking is 21. :(

#OOTN (blue dress from Forever 21)

Guess?! haha so obvious! My costume was...was... a girl. LOL

So cold. I was wearing denim jacket from Zara. It was 3 degrees Celcius that day. Ee Leng make up theme was a cat girl I guess. LOL. Two of us are drunk, didn't apply blush. #imjustsaying

Next party, a Halloween party at a professor's house. Okay quite cool right. The professor was a DJ of the night. 

Drinking game was in progress. Spot the pilot, mermaid, clown (JY), zombie?! (Yoong Sheng)

Brain jelly! I know. It looks disgusting! But it tasted surprisingly good. lol

Felt the party so boring, so we went back to the Great Wall restaurant to continue our clubbing session. Dance dance dance. I have to mention here, everyone thought I was drunk because I said Hi to every stranger I met at the professor's house. I didn't. I just felt very high lol. Ee Leng thought I was crazy when I said Hi to others at Great Wall.. I was not. I just said Hi to my classmates. We went back at 3. Exhausted. 

On the exact day of Halloween. I went to John's house for pumpkin craving. Uhm. An event organized by BISM, a Christian organization in Bloomington. Before the event started, we went to a church to buy pumpkin. All funds they got, they will donate for Bloomington homeless people. :)

So tiny so cute. I got this. But it ended up with this pattern

Pity this pumpkin. I don't have any artistic gene. LOL

This is Taiki Peter Nakanishi's pumpkin. So big! But it ended up with this pattern.

Taiki! You were so creative! haha. He made us laugh like a mad that day! 

For more photos, kindly click here. Taiki snapped many nice photos! :)

I miss pumpkin seeds. It tastes good after baked. It's what we called as "Kuaci" in Malaysia.

On Halloween weekend, went to another party. Yea I know. Many parties. Huan Chin said I hard core for party. Dang it. 

#OOTN red maxi dress from Kitchen. Sorry forgot to snap full one. I matched my dress with a pair of red kicks from Urban Outfitter, only 9.99 dollars. My costume was a China ghost, but I wonder who got it right, because I didn't apply make up. 

I know yea. Can't see anything. haha It's too dark. Me (left) and Ee Leng (right). The only thing we can see here is Ee Leng's teeth. :O

Chin Hua! I think his costume was a kid. LOL

Best costume! JY! Guess! :D :D He was the clown I mentioned above! 

Still can't get it? He was L in death note! Spot his fingers! :D

We went to Waffle house after the party at 3. Yummy! Love Waffle House's menu. They serve breakfast, lunch and dinner until midnight. I ordered breakfast set. Love pancake, sunny side-up, sausage. I can't live without eggs. Fried eggs, sunny side-up, and scrambled eggs are my all time favorite. lol

Again. The last weekend. I went for a mask party at Great Wall restaurant. FML. 3 continuous party weekends. lol. I think this is the 1st time I really dressed up to match the event. 

Make up of the night. Kind of heavy make up. Yea. I know.. Credit: Lexi King (my roommate) Ee Leng said it looks so ugly because Americans don't know how to apply make up for Asians, as our facial features are really different as them. I quite like actually. hahaha. 

Mask from College mall, only 0.99 cents. :) #OOTN floral dress from Topshop. I did straightened my hair.

Partner of the night! Tracy! She is from Shanghai, China. Ahh! She's so lovely! 

Lurve her! <3

I wore a wrong outfit, should choose a black dress or something shinning. LOL. Sorry. I didn't have so many clubbing experience. Lesson learnt. This event mostly participated by Chinese and Korean. Uhm. Korean boys like to do those "walk dance", my eyes almost popped out when I first saw. After that okay. It's acceptable. Walk dance, uhmm. I defined as boys use their lower part err err rub girls butt. Uhhh. Although it sounds hiao, lol. But those Korean boys will respect you, if you really don't like this action, just say "hands free please", or turn your body slightly right or left, then they will know. :D This is what Tracy taught me. But some girls can accept... err.., it's kind of too over. Like I saw a girl uhmmm WHEN EVERYONE SAW SHE DANCING WITH A KOREAN BOY, EVERYONE FELT SHY. Too sexy. hahaha. RUB RUB RUB RUB. front rub back rub O.O Some people even perform hot kiss, that was their first met. Tracy and me were so funny, we actually calculate the time for them. 5 minutes, rest 10 seconds, then continued. 

On the journey we going back. We were talking this uhmm. We were wondering how can they breath. 4 girls and one boy were gossiping. That boy said "You girls sure don't have any experience before." It sounds sarcastic. All of us asked him "YOU HAVE MANY EXPERIENCES BEFORE". Then the boy felt awkward. Thanks for fetching us back! I forgot that boy's name. One of the organizers. 

This Halloween! Awesome! So outgoing. Yay! :) 

Bye! Longest post ever! :D

Gonna blog about my niece and the world fare at IU next time. Stay tuned. :)

Hi guys. It's been quite a long time since the last heard. I knew I did a blog entry a few days ago, but I didn't really mention about my current life in US. While, as my readers know, I am studying at Indiana University (IU) which located at Bloomington, Indiana currently.

Here're some of the photos about my University! :) All these photos taken by using iPhone 4s and the filters.

The signature of IU, Sample Gate.

The stadium! :) Took this at 7.30am. So it looks nice even unedited :P

Does it looks real? This is shown beside the Musical Arts Center.

Forgot where I took this. But looks nice! I love purple color :)

The TIS bookstore

Indiana promise! :) This is important for the students to know about.

Picnic sessions.

My lovely roommate and floormate! Lexi(Left), Me(Middle), and Andrea (Left)

All of us again! In front of the sample gate.

Oops. Seriously Americans love to jog. You can see people jog everywhere and anytime. Imagine under -1 degree, they can still wear a short pant and jogging. Oh Jeez.

A corner in the Memorial Union. It's a hotel, but students love to study in the lobby. Me too. I love to sleep on the sofa. lol

My major is undecided, but definitely related to business. I love business, and I don't know why. I can feel the excitement when I am taking those business courses. I am trying hard to get into the Kelley Business School, I have to maintain my result at 83 for every subject. Freaking hard -__- But I will try.

Teaching methods in US has a big difference compared to Malaysia. In Malaysia, all I done, was "hard core" for the tests and finals two or three days before, and I just wish I can pass. If I still continuing my study life in Malaysia, planning to get a Bachelor's degree in Malaysia now, I can imagine what happens to my life now. I will have a normal life just like others do. I would finish my degree in 4 years time, maybe work as a normal clerk after I graduated. But I can find my passionate here, all the professors are good. They don't want you leant everything from the textbooks, they want you to do a lots of case study, and don't only memorize the theories, practical practical practical are what they wanted. Of course, you can't bring your study habit from Malaysia to US, you have to study before classes, know what your professors are going to talk about, because what they give you in classes are only brief summary, and revise the class materials after class. I have at least 5 assignments per week. All assignments have to hand in online. Normally, after a class, you will have one assignment for that class. SO, I'M BUSY!

Finished the wonderful part, below is not really a good part, just skip if you don't like. I also don't like this part. Firstly, hands up if you are from SMK, but you didn't speak English when your secondary times school and with your family. I AM! :)

Yes. I am studying in US, but my English sucks. :( I have to say, don't come here if you don't have a strong heart, but fragile one just like me. I can't count how many times I been hurt because of my English, but definitely more than those days when I was in Malaysia. hahahaha

I told Panda, Idk why I can speak English more fluently, but not good in front of Americans compared to Malaysian, maybe I'm worried that I would be laughed by Malaysians. Yes, they did. I had to go for the pronunciation class the first eight weeks when semester started. I don't feel shy to tell this, because I know my English sucks. While, when I pronounce wrongly in front of my Malaysian friends they laughed at me. I was not mad, just got frustrated. Then, they complained to others, I don't want speak English. Fine. I really think about this seriously, I think it's my fault. Since, I'm in US, I should try I should try to speak English, not Cantonese, Hokkien or Chinese, these Asian languages, I can speak this when I back to Asia. I really tried I swear I did try, I want to learn I want to improve. Just like yesterday, when I spoke English to Ee Leng, she just said to my face "Why your English so weird one? I feel like you're reading rather than speaking English" You guys can imagine how frustrated I was, just like a knife stab into my heart. LOL no joke. It felt hurt.  Then I just switch back to my lovely Asian language for the whole conversation, at least I feel safe. So, when you guys know something would definitely hurt you, would you still try? No, right? So, please don't complain me please don't judge me. I know you guys wanted me to learn, but please please don't do this to me. You guys never know what I felt when you guys said this to me. What you guys expected from me. Talk like a native Americans in the first year? I know I am worse than you guys, but I didn't speak English when I was in home. I am trying trying. Can you guys care about my feelings, at least 40%? I know the world is cruel, but you guys are also Malaysian. Why you guys wanted to hurt someone who came from the same country. Or you guys just think I bring shame for our country. All these shits I also don't want it happens in my life. Just like, what they told me, let me lose my confidence at all. I really gave a thought about "Did I make a right choice, did I? Should I just pick up Taiwan, China or just stay in Malaysia?" Do you guys know what you guys are doing? Strangling my dream I dreamt once. But you guys know? You guys care?

I don't think my story can inspire who is going to overseas study, probably make them afraid. But I really wish you guys can be tough, after you go through all these, you can grow, you can improve. I am not. I need some times to adjust my mood. Give me some time............please..........................

I will try I really will try, after I get my confidence back......

Now, I miss my lovely people back to the hometown, the wind, the smell of paddy.

Who cares me, who knows me, who loves me in US? It's so hard to find a person who accepts who I am in US. 

I started to understand the feeling "you would never change the world, only the world changes you."

I need someone to hold me up.....